• baby: d... d... d...
  • father: ...dad? omg you are going to say dad as your first word!!!
  • baby: d... dONT WANNA BE AN AMERICAN IDIOT
  • baby: *guitar sounds from baby's mouth*
Jul 25th / 36,827 notes †
luvsmercury:

im pregnant…
but remember when brandon said that a good way to give oral sex is delicately jfc

luvsmercury:

im pregnant…

but remember when brandon said that a good way to give oral sex is delicately jfc Jul 25th / Tagged: I can't goodbye / 144 notes †
  • Friend: Do you use Tumblr? It's so funny!
  • Me: eh...sometimes...I'm not that into it
  • Friend: Aw I was gonna say follow me! Oh well
  • Me: Yeah sorry :/
  • Me: *continues to be a world famous blogger*
Jul 25th / 91,126 notes †

clearlypositive:

do you ever wanna talk about a thing but you know you already talk about it too much and your friends are sick of hearing about it so instead you just hold it all inside you and constantly feel like you’re gonna burst?

Jul 25th / 188,335 notes †
Jul 25th / 181 notes †
Jul 24th / 272 notes †
dumbufo:

I refuse to scroll down

dumbufo:

I refuse to scroll down

Jul 24th / Tagged: stupid fucking nash / 13,340 notes †

aobadatsgay:

I AM FUCKING DEAD. SO I WAS HAVING TROUBLE DOWNLOADING THE SIMS 2 THING THAT’S BEEN GOING AROUND SO I CONTACTED THEIR LIVE CHAT SUPPORT FOR HELP. WELL THE PERSON WANTED MY INFO AND FOR ME TO ANSWER THE SECURITY QUESTION I SET UP SO THEY COULD PUT THE GAME IN MY COLLECTION.
THE QUESTION WAS “What was your dream job as a kid?”
GUESS WHO HAD TO ANSWER THAT QUESTION TO A LIVE PERSON WITH “Doing your mom.”. SPOILET ALERT IT WAS FUCKING ME.

Jul 24th / 10,650 notes †
2,379 plays

jasonfnsaint:

The Strokes

Last Nite

Is This It?

Jul 24th / Tagged: fave / 586 notes †

Jul 24th / 14,076 notes †

She kicked and screamed while I held her close

I swore I’d never let her go

|x|

Jul 24th / Tagged: jenny was a friend of mine / 756 notes †
lx34e:

me and my friend arriving at an all you can eat buffet 

lx34e:

me and my friend arriving at an all you can eat buffet 

Jul 24th / 405,393 notes †

lascapigliata:

turns my fan on high so i can still sleep with a blanket

Jul 24th / 86,471 notes †

[on musical influences] So it’s not the certain elements of certain bands, but certain elements that exist in a lot of bands and music that you compile and make your own? x x

Jul 24th / Tagged: sam's town brandon did a lot of weird stuff with his hands tho that's just brandon being brandon tbh / 2,233 notes †

eddardstarks:

[heavy breathing] do you want to talk about the killers

Jul 24th / Tagged: me / 26,790 notes †

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